Alone

My husband left me.

I had asked him to leave by the end of the month. But we got into another fight and he left the apartment while I was at work.

I found out through an email. Not a face to face conversation. Not a phone call. Not even a text message. Wait. I did get a text, but it was to check my email.

I know we had problems, but for him to walk out like that was completely cowardly and disrespectful. I never thought he could hurt me more than he already had, but he did. Whenever I felt there were issues between us, he always pushed me to talked about, no matter how uncomfortable I felt. And the last month or so, I’ve actually been voluntarily telling him. He never reciprocated. I wonder if he ever really loved or respected me.

I think he loved the idea of me. I think he want to be with someone who doesn’t really speak up; who takes what he says as gospel and doesn’t question it. And instead he got me.

I spent so many years in silence and it hasn’t really gotten me anywhere. I refuse to stay silent. I will speak up for myself. I will protect myself.

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3 thoughts on “Alone

  1. I am so sorry – I have been wondering how you have been coming along – with school and life. I really am sorry – i will say this – never be quiet – speak what you feel – speak your mind. xx

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